Yes he did beat her BUT she provoked him, BUT she insulted him, BUT she shouldn’t have been there, BUT she dressed wrong, BUT she/ he was cheating, BUT he annoyed her…

Plenty of Senator Elisha, Pastor Biodun and Hanans husbands sympathizers have a series of buts lined up at the base of their throats ready to defend their actions.

Have you realized that the buts are mere excuses used to try and justify your actions or the actions of whoever it is you are defending? 

Violence means inflicting physical pain and what I’m addressing now is consciously and willfully inflicting pain on another person on the basis that they have wronged you or you feel entitled.

There are so many appropriate ways to react. So many right ways to of expressing displeasure for example by voicing it out and there are so many peaceful methods of settlement and violence is not one of them.

The beating culture is on a rise. It has been condoned by the society from time immemorial but awareness that no one has a right to your body but you is really settling in. If you take yourself to a place were beating is a sport, then you’ve signed up for it. But were you take your child to a school and a teacher beats him; it’s wrong. Because we know it’s for the sake of deterrence but what if that isn’t his lucky day and he hits a very sensitive organ or worse, kills the child. 

A husband has no right to lay a finger on his wife, a religious leader has no right to harass, a high government official has no right to slap, a woman has no right to pour acid based on jealousy, a teacher has no right to hit. It is not your body and you are not the law, you have no right to inflict pain.

Now a sort of revolution has started in Nigeria which is a product of the self-awareness aforementioned. People are angry at the growing rate of beating and harassment or rather of reported beating and harassment cases and that has led a demand for accountability. That is the only reason why a woman who allegedly stabbed her husband in self defense was not ostracised and why a pastor reported for sexual harassment was made to step down and why a senator who slapped a woman several times on camera has been detained. This is the power of the people.

Once harassment is not being condoned by the society regardless of gender and the people who do so are made to come to order, we will see a noticeable change for the better in the appalling beating culture and the victims will have a courage to not only speak out but stand their own.

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